Vanessa Bryant on deaths of Kobe, Gianna: 'I can't process both at the same time'

Feb. 10 (UPI) -- Vanessa Bryant penned an emotional message on social media Monday, expressing her sadness and anger as she continues to cope with the deaths of her husband, Kobe Bryant, and daughter, Gianna, in last month's helicopter crash.

In a lengthy post on Instagram, Vanessa Bryant said she's been "reluctant to put my feelings into words" and has struggled to "accept that both Kobe and Gigi are gone."

"My brain refuses to accept that both Kobe and Gigi are gone," she wrote. "I can't process both at the same time. It's like I'm trying to process Kobe being gone but my body refuses to accept my Gigi will never come back to me. It feels wrong. Why should I be able to wake up another day when my baby girl isn't being able to have that opportunity?! I'm so mad. She had so much life to live."

Bryant said she realizes that she must remain strong for her three surviving daughters, Natalia, Bianka and Capri.

"Mad I'm not with Kobe and Gigi but thankful that I'm here with Natalia, Bianka and Capri," she wrote. "I know what I'm feeling is normal. It's part of the grieving process. I just wanted to share in case there's anyone out there that's experienced a loss like this. God I wish they were here and this nightmare would be over.

"Praying for all of the victims of this horrible tragedy. Please continue to pray for all."

The post also included a video feature from Slam Magazine about Kobe coaching Gianna's youth basketball team. Kobe Bryant, his 13-year-old daughter, Gianna, and seven others were killed when their helicopter crashed into a mountainside on Jan. 26 in Calabasas, Calif. The group was headed to a girls basketball tournament at Kobe's Mamba Sports Academy.

A public memorial was held Monday for Orange Coast College baseball coach John Altobelli, his wife, Keri, and daughter, Alyssa. Also killed in the crash were veteran pilot Ara Zobayan, Christina Mauser, Sarah Chester and her daughter, Payton.

Vanessa Bryant announced last week that a "celebration of life" memorial will be held Feb. 24 at Staples Center to honor Kobe and Gianna.