Grab a beer, it's debate time. UPI/Gary C. Caskey |
License Photo
Last week we rounded up the web's best presidential drinking games, but a veep showdown requires an entirely different set of rules. If we're lucky, they'll be plenty of gaffes, political mis-steps and awkward moments to keep the booze flowing.
Time magazine, the publication that brought you Paul Ryan's bicep curls, awards sips if Biden mentions Ryan's youth and five seconds of drinking if Biden brings up his wife, Jill. But if "Biden says “P90X,” flexes, and winks at the camera, shut off the TV. That’s the best it’s going to get all night."
Drink two seconds for any mention of wonky words like "budget," "deficit" and "entitlements," recommends PolicyMic. Five seconds if either candidate brings up "apple," "church," or "Jimmy Carter." If Biden says "This is a big f***ing deal," you're down for the count.
If you favor Esquire's drinking game, you'll be taking a shot for any mention of "Benghazi," "Big Bird" or "fiscal cliff." They also get specific with their drinking game beers. "Down a couple PBRs" is Ryan mentions his dad.
If you like a good visual (sometimes, drinking games can make reading difficult), Salon.com brings you this helpful chart. It awards one drink if Biden says "voucher" and two drinks if Ryan calls himself a "little bit wonky." Don't even think about the word "literally," because Salon warns, "You will die."
The market-watchers at CNBC will be focusing on catchphrases like "honest to God," "I'm telling ya," and "bacon shortage." Personally, we're ESPECIALLY interested in what both candidates have to say about the forthcoming bacon apocalypse.
Head over to the Examiner's drinking game if you want to chug when Biden calls Obamacare a "big deal," take a swig if anyone mention's Ryan's marathon time or drink three sips if Jill Biden facepalms.
For Buzzfeed, it's all pretty simple.
Alternatively:
For politicos watching their figure, Jezebel has put together a "Debate Workout Game," which includes Jane Fonda aerobics for "any mention of Ronald Reagan or trickle-down economics," and something called "Economic Decline Pushups" if Ryan talks about America's rapid decline.
