Hugh Laurie, Stephen Colbert read a list of vulgar terms you can say on basic cable [VIDEO]

The big four networks -- ABC, CBS, NBC and Fox -- petitioned the FCC for looser indecency standards back in June, arguing that they've lost "cultural clout" to cable networks that can say and do more profane things on television.

The networks' call for less "archaic" terminology inspired Stephen Colbert, whose Comedy Central show is owned by the company Viacom, to acknowledge the phrases that he's allowed to say on basic cable that the big four can't.

On Monday, he invited "award-winning British person and recovering network star" Hugh Laurie to read an actual list of Viacom's approved terms, including "penis" and "sit on your face."