Watercooler Stories

By United Press International  |  Jan. 31, 2006 at 6:30 AM
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Britons offended by new Diana doll

EL PASO, Texas, Jan. 31 (UPI) -- Oops -- the Texas-based Time Capsule Toys latest talking doll is Britain's Diana, the princess of "Whales," it was reported Monday.

The toymaker not only misspelled "Wales," it has created what the Mirror has dubbed "the most tasteless, tackiest-ever tribute to Diana."

The figurine "looks nothing like" the late fashion trendsetter with disjointed ankles, garish make-up and "unconvincing hair," the newspaper said.

Even more distressing to the British, however, are the 16 phrases uttered when a button is pushed in the doll's back.

"I'd like to be a queen of people's hearts," "I don't sit here with resentment, I sit here with sadness" and "I want to do good things," are the sentences programmed into the doll, which retails for about $32.

Teens sing hymn to cover church theft

CAMBORNE, England, Jan. 31 (UPI) -- A group of teenagers tried to cover a theft at a Cornwall church by choosing a hymn and singing it before fleeing.

The Rev. Bill Stuart-White, who says his recent trips to the gym have finally started paying off, said the three teens led him on a 400-yard chase after they stole a woman's purse, keys, a hat and gloves from the church vestry. The teens requested and sang "The Lord Is My Shepherd" before hoofing it.

"There was a lot of hilarity among the congregation at me in full robes pursuing thieves down the street, but it turned slightly less hilarious when it was realized other things had been taken," said Stuart-White, pastor of St. Martins Church and Meriadocs in Camborne.

Police are holding two girls, 15 and 16, and a 17-year-old boy, the Telegraph reported.

Man scams PR firms for major freebies

NEW YORK, Jan. 31 (UPI) -- A New York City man lived the high life for five days with freebies after hoodwinking public relations firms into believing he was a magazine publisher.

Mac Montandon, 34, told the New York Post he had business cards printed up for ridiculous, fictional magazines, and then set about contacting PR firms.

In just days, he filled his calendar with free breakfasts, lunches, dinners, lodging, theater tickets and an invitation to a costume party thrown by the Hearst family in an Upper East Side mansion, where he mingled with Ivana Trump.

"I didn't do it to be malicious; it was more of a curiosity -- just how far could I push it?" Montandon said. "I'm fairly certain I could have acquired a Smith & Wesson pistol, a karaoke machine, hockey equipment, Trojan condoms, a night at a sleep-therapy lab, Canadian bird-flu vaccine and nights at the Hilton and Trump International Hotel."

Some choosing burial with pets

CHICAGO, Jan. 31 (UPI) -- The head of a suburban Chicago funeral business says more people are opting to be buried with their beloved departed pets in family plots.

Pets typically are buried in pet-only cemeteries, but Louis Rago, president of Memorial Traditions, said at least two or three times a month he is asked about what he calls "pet-friendly" burials.

A 40-acre site has been set aside for pet/owner burials at the Eden Park Cemetery in Schiller Park, Ill., and a 20-acre site is "pet-friendly" at the Pine View Cemetery in Beach Park, the Chicago Sun-Times said.

"It sounds funny, but some people love their pets more than they love some of the family members," Rago told the newspaper.

Since pets usually die earlier, he said the pet is buried about 7 1/2 feet deep in a concrete vault and the owner is buried about 6 feet deep above the animal when they depart.

The burials are not just for Fluffy and Rover.

A woman recently buried her daughter's black and white pet guinea pig in a family plot.

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