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Jockstrip: The world as we know it

By United Press International
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Hawaiian cat stuck in dresser for 44 days

HONOLULU, March 22 (UPI) -- No one knows how many lives a hapless house cat used up during the 44 days it was trapped inside a dresser as it was shipped from Hawaii to Kentucky.

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Larry Fife and his family swears their 3-year-old pet cat, Cane, made the trip from Oahu to Crofton, Ky., trapped inside a dresser and then gave them a forlorn meow when they finally opened the drawer in late January.

The Honolulu Star Bulletin reported the trans-Pacific animal adventure in its Tuesday edition.

The Fifes told the newspaper Cane was discovered missing in mid-December as they packed for the move to the mainland. A mover had assured them the cat wasn't inside the dresser when he taped the drawer shut, although Cane had been able to open the drawer and use it for cat naps in the past.

The mover was apparently mistaken, however, because when Fife opened the drawer at his family's new residence, he saw a familiar face looking at him and meowing.


White House stages annual Easter egg roll

WASHINGTON, March 22 (UPI) -- Children and cartoon characters take over the South Lawn of the White House next week for the annual Easter Egg Roll and party, it was announced Tuesday.

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The roll has been a feature at the White House since 1878, and this year it would be held on Monday, with other special events taking place on the adjacent Ellipse.

The White House said there would be live music, special book reading corners, stage shows and characters from children's educational programming, including "Clifford the Big Red Dog," Leona from "Between the Lions" and "The Berenstain Bears."

Easter Egg rolling, a popular holiday game in 19th Century Washington, used to take place informally at the U.S. Capitol until lawmakers banned it in 1878 because of lawn damage.

As the story goes, President Rutherford B. Hayes, hearing of the children's plight, took pity and invited them to use the White House for their games.

The White House said the National Park Service would distribute tickets for the event on a first-come, first-served basis at the Ellipse Visitor's Pavilion Saturday. There will be a ticket maximum of five per person.


Rhubarb row results in remediation

LONDON, March 22 (UPI) -- A British court has ordered a 50-year-old woman to community service for whacking her 72-year-old brother with her prize-winning rhubarb.

Margaret Porter, 50, hit her brother William, 72, during a row over their father's will, Sky News reported.

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Porter said she threw the rhubarb at her brother after he tried to back over her with his car, but magistrates did not seem impressed, ordering her to stop assaulting people and perform 40 hours of community service.

Her lawyer urged the court to keep the "offense" and the "offender" in perspective.

"We are not dealing with a serious, dangerous, member of society," he argued.

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