Jockstrip: The World As We Know It

INTRIGUING PEOPLE

People magazine has named its "25 most intriguing people of 2001." Half of them are entertainers.

The publication fails to mention Osama bin Laden among its most intriguing individuals, in the same way the suspected terrorist mastermind was not chosen "Person of the Year" by Time magazine. If he's worth $25 million dead or alive, how can the multi-millionaire mastermind of al Qaida and financiers of the Taliban be ignored by Time and People?

Topping the list is San Francisco Giant outfielder Barry Bonds, followed by President Bush, Mariah Carey and Rep. Gary Condit, D-Calif. Nicole Kidman, Harry Potter, David Letterman, Madonna and England's Prince Harry round out the top 10 on the list.

Also making the grade: Julia Roberts, Katie Couric, Reese Witherspoon, former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani, Jennifer Aniston, singer Diana Krall, Kim Catrall, Kelly Ripa (Kathie Lee Gifford's replacement), Condoleezza Rice (Bush's national security adviser), Mel Brooks, 9/11 widow Lisa Beamer, stem-cell scientist James Thomson, author Jonathan Franzen, psychic John Edward, space tourist Dennis Tito, and the cast of TV's "Friends."

THINGS WE DON'T UNDERSTAND

Indian police are clamping down on kite fliers after a 19-year-old motorcycle rider was killed after his throat was slit by a kite string in the southern city of Chennai.

The teenager was returning home from college when he hit the string. It was the second incident in a week involving a kite string injury. Earlier, a girl suffered serious cuts on her neck when she came into contact with a kite string.

Serious kite fliers in India strengthen and sharpen the strings with a mix of glass powder and chemicals.

"My only son is no more. I appeal to all parents not to allow their children to fly kites," the latest victim's mother said.

NEWS OF OTHER LIFE FORMS

Did you know Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi is protected by elite female bodyguards? We thought not.

TODAY'S SIGN THE WORLD IS ENDING

A 41-year-old Chicago woman faces felony neglect charges following the death of her mother, who was found in a squalid South Side apartment.

Vicki Cooper, an employee of ATA Airlines, told police her mother had Alzheimer's disease and that she had failed to feed and care for her for "no good reason."

Paramedics said Vera Cooper, 73, was wearing only a light shirt and was severely malnourished and dehydrated when they responded to a call in sub-freezing cold Friday night. She was covered in feces lying on a cockroach-infested bed and had been bitten by mice, authorities said, and died the next day in the hospital.

Vicki Cooper said in a statement to police that she had not bathed her mother in more than four months and had stopped taking care of the debris-filled apartment they shared about a month ago because she didn't want to do it.

An upstairs neighbor said she phoned the city's emergency hotline because of the stench coming from the apartment.

AND FINALLY, TODAY'S UPLIFTING STORY

Many people enter into marriage knowing little about the institution. Most of it they may have picked up from their parents or movies.

But, according to the Cincinnati Enquirer, when Jane Harrier and Hazen Master got married last weekend, they brought a combined total of 101 years of experience into the union. Master had been married for 51 years, until widowed last year. Harrier had been married for 50 until her husband died.

The pair met last October. Master asked Harrier if she wanted to have dinner. Harrier told the publication that the meeting marked the first time anyone had asked her to go on a date in half a century.

Friends and family, including some grandchildren, attended the wedding. The publication says there are more than two million marriages each year in this country, but it's rare that bride and groom are both 75.

(Thanks to UPI Feature Reporter Dennis Daily)