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'SNL' demands NYers 'stop punching character actors in the face'

"We've asked Paul Giamatti to shelter in place," guest host Jake Gyllenhaal, playing a cop at a press conference, joked this weekend.

Jake Gyllenhaal guest hosted "Saturday Night Live" this weekend. File Photo by Jim Ruymen/UPI
1 of 3 | Jake Gyllenhaal guest hosted "Saturday Night Live" this weekend. File Photo by Jim Ruymen/UPI | License Photo

May 19 (UPI) -- Road House and Presumed Innocent actor Jake Gyllenhaal played a New York City cop leading a press conference on Saturday Night Live this weekend.

Guest host Gyllenhaal played Sgt. Jeff MacDougal and, in a heartfelt speech said, that while there are a lot of great things to enjoy about New York, the recent random acts of violence, particularly on celebrities, needs to stop.

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"Just this week, national treasure Steve Buscemi was punched while walking through Kips Bay," MacDougal said.

"These types of attacks cannot and will not be tolerated. So, to everyone watching, I have one important message: Stop punching character actors in the face. Unfortunately, this follows similar assaults on Rick Moranis and the shockingly versatile Michael Stuhlbarg."

MacDougal said the New York Police Department has assigned security details to others whose faces are familiar, but names are not.

Stars who might be at-risk, he added, include the prolific Stephen Root, actresses who played girlfriends on Seinfeld and actors who have played boyfriends on Sex and the City.

"We've asked Paul Giamatti to shelter in place," MacDougal said, noting that character actors are the life's blood of the entertainment industry.

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Fargo and Mad Men alum Jon Hamm also popped out of the faux press corps to ask if he has anything to worry about since being hit in the face would leave him just "a tall guy with a perfect body."

MacDougal assured him he should be fine, then recommended the public refrain from hitting actors who work, not because they are good-looking, but because they are talented.

"Next time you see a character actor on the street, don't punch him. Google him to figure out the thing that he was in and thank them," MacDougal said.

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