Caitlyn Jenner at the Elton John AIDS Foundation Academy Awards viewing party on February 28. File Photo by Christine Chew/UPI | License Photo
LOS ANGELES, Aug. 4 (UPI) -- Caitlyn Jenner says she considered suicide during an uncertain time in her gender transition.
The 66-year-old reality star revealed on this week's Any Given Wednesday with Bill Simmons that she contemplated killing herself after a paparazzo photographed her leaving the doctor after her Adam's apple surgery.
"I could not sleep that night. I'm up until 3 a.m. walking up and down my hallway, thinking, 'Damn, all this [expletive] is going to come out tomorrow and it's going to be horrible," Jenner recalled. "And I said, 'You know what? Easy way. Go in the other room. You got a gun.'"
"[I thought], 'No more pain, no more nothing. I don't have to deal with the tabloids any longer. I don't have to deal with any of this,'" she confessed. "And that was probably the lowest I've ever gotten."
Jenner, who was hounded for months before going public with her transition, said she decided the next day that suicide was "a terrible way" to end her life. The star did admit, however, that her life is much easier now that she's open about being transgender.
"Going through this, I have renewed my excitement for life. My life today is so interesting, so simple. It really is so simple," she said. "My life was so complicated [before ... I could] live authentically."
Jenner landed an E! series, I Am Cait, about her transition after confirming she's transgender in April 2015. E! told LGBTQ Nation Wednesday that "no decision has been made" about the future of the show after news outlets reported the series was canceled.