LONDON, Aug. 9 -- A Church of England court Tuesday backed a vicar's ban on the use of warmhearted words such as 'dad' and 'grandad' on family gravestones because they were inappropriate. The ecclesiastic Consistory Court ruled that such familiar terms were simply not necessary when trying to express customary feelings and affections. The decision followed a family's bid to use the words 'dad' and 'grandad' on the gravestone of Frederick Brown who died in December 1992, aged 83. Brown was buried at the Holy Trinity Church in the village of Freckleton in northwest England. He has no tombstone, just a bouquet of fresh flowers which are placed above his grave each week. On receiving the court's written findings Tuesday the Brown family told reporters they were now considering exhuming his coffin and burying it at a church that allowed a gravestone bearing the words they wanted. 'We never called him father and we never called him grandfather, and he never liked those terms himself,' said Wendy Brown, who is married to Frederick's son. Wordings on Church of England gravestones are at the discretion of 43 regional dioceses around the country. For the past three years Holy Trinity's Rev. Stephen Brian has maintained a policy that bans words such as those wanted by the Brown family. Ironically, the Browns can walk past other gravestones in the Holy Trinity churchyard bearing the words 'dad' and 'grandad.' They were allowed by previous reverends. John Bullimore, chancellor of the Blackburn Diocese, said the court's decision only affected Brian's parish and did not set a national precedent.
However, he said the ruling did provide a guideline for other churchyards in the diocese and would be of 'persuasive' force elsewhere. 'If the argument is that one needs to use words used by the family it would be impossible to allow 'dad,' or 'grandad' without allowing other words such as 'mom,' 'mam, 'da,', 'grandpa,' or 'nana,'' Bullimore said. 'I know my decision will be a great disappointment to the petitioners. I can only say that in my judgement a greater good is served by upholding the Chancellor's Regulations and Churchyards Handbook than by allowing an exception. Regretfully, I must dismiss this petition.'
