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Jimmy Kimmel

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“ The only thing better than breaking up is going on 'The View' right after you break up ”
Kimmel dons 'Rosie' drag for 'View' stop
United Press International
“ What do you mean, what happened? Look at me. What do you think happened? I'm a 41-year-old man with a bra filled with Koosh balls. I'm an imbecile. She couldn't date an imbecile anymore. ”
Kimmel dons 'Rosie' drag for 'View' stop
United Press International
“ This is going to be a little bit loose tonight because I am a member of the writer's guild and we're on strike ”
American Music Awards begin in LA
United Press International
“ Joe is extremely competent and creative and, most importantly, he didn't creep us out ”
DeMaio tabbed as new 'Kimmel' director
United Press International
“ Audioslave is a great band that deserves a great platform and on top of that, it's always fun to close a street down ”
Audioslave concert on Hollywood Blvd.
United Press International
“ I know this sounds like one of Courtney Love's stories ”
Jimmy Kimmel reacts to Advil on air
United Press International
“ I went to the emergency room and they let all the helium out ”
Jimmy Kimmel reacts to Advil on air
United Press International
“ All we saw of her was a puff of smoke, like what the 'Road Runner' leaves behind ”
Omarosa walks of 'Jimmy Kimmel Live'
United Press International
“ The guy would say, 'Yes, yes, OK,' and we'd give him the phone number of our house, and then he'd call back right away and we would pretend to be the dad ”
Cathy's World: Crank Yankers
United Press International
NBA: Denver 114, Miami 96
NHL: St. Louis 3, San Jose 2 (SO)
NHL: Los Angeles 6, Ottawa 3
NBA: Houston 111, Golden State 109
COL FB: Oregon 37, Oregon St. 33
NHL: Phoenix 2, Calgary 1
NHL: Buffalo 6, Montreal 2
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