That would be don't try stealing a tanker truck with 6,000 gallons of milk, especially if the truck has a tracking device that tips off the owners that the milk is on the move when it shouldn't be.
Even with tires of the truck blown out by stop sticks, the thieves kept driving, The Age reported.
After a 2-hour drive, police corralled the truck, but then had to break the windows, because the thieves would not get out.
Don't try flying Air France without taking a little spare change along, just in case.
That would be just in case the plane runs low on fuel.
CNN reported that airline fuel can only be purchased with cash in Damascus, Syria. That said, when an Air France flight was diverted to Damascus for security concerns, the flight crew asked passengers if they had any cash to fuel the plane for its hop to Beirut, Lebanon, its original destination.
"Ultimately, Air France could pay the full amount itself, and passengers did not have to advance any cash," the airline said in a statement.
In Hawthorne, Fla., don't let your girlfriend catch you checking out another woman's behind.
That would be backside, butt, caboose, buns, keister, rump, fanny, tush or derriere -- no ogling, please.
The Gainesville, Fla., Sun reported that police arrested Deborah Slaton after she repeatedly slapped her boyfriend for checking out another woman's buttocks in a local gaming room.
As the altercation escalated, witnesses helped separate the couple, at which point the man left.
An hour later, he returned in a van, which he parked in a parking lot. In an attempt to calm Slaton down, he walked toward her truck, at which point she stepped on the gas, headed right toward him, and when he jumped out of the way, she slammed the truck into the van.
She was arrested and held in lieu of $5,000 bond, the newspaper said.
Finally, don't try stuffing something in your nose and then forgetting where you put it.
A 6-year-old in Salt Lake City had three years of health problems, the cause of which eluded doctors until an ears, nose and throat specialist threaded a camera up the lad's nose.
The doctor found a ball of fuzz, medically known as "a ball of fungus," his doctor said.
The fungus was growing around a small rubber wheel from a toy, ABC News reported.
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