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Jockstrip: The world as we know it.

April 5, 2012 at 6:00 AM   |   Comments

Naked drunks ride cart through car wash

ABBOTSFORD, British Columbia, April 5 (UPI) -- Three young, drunken and naked British Columbia men escaped charges and came out squeaky clean after riding a grocery cart through a car wash, police said.

Police in Abbotsford were called after midnight Tuesday by neighbors who heard screaming coming from a drive-through, 24-hour car wash, the Vancouver Sun reported.

Constable Ian MacDonald said when officers arrived, they found three 23-year-old inebriated men getting dressed.

The trio told officers they had stripped and gotten into a shopping cart to ride through the car wash, the Canadian Broadcasting Corp. reported.

"Not knowing at this point whether they picked 'typhoon' or 'super typhoon' I'd suggest that either of those and the combination of the brushes that would have come past them would be enough to definitely leave you with a little bit of a memory of what you had done the prior night," MacDonald said.

Police issued warnings, but didn't charge the men.

MacDonald told the CBC it was fortunate the trio hadn't selected a hot wax cycle.


Police find stolen truck being buried

MACEDON, N.Y., April 5 (UPI) -- A father and son in upstate New York face possible charges after the son was allegedly spotted burying a stolen box truck in a sand pit, investigators said.

Macedon, N.Y., police and the Orleans County Sheriff's Office said the 26-foot-long box truck was taken last week from a Macedon business and their only leads were the name of a company, Country Construction, and the first name of a suspect, Jeff, The (Batavia, N.Y.) Daily News reported Wednesday.

The sheriff's office said deputies using a helicopter spotted Jeffery Paul, the son of Country Construction owner David Paul, 72, using a bulldozer to bury the truck in a sand pit on a 77-acre parcel of land owned by the family.

The Pauls were taken into custody and investigators searched the property Friday and discovered the stolen truck, two stolen backhoes, a stolen backhoe that had been dismantled and a stolen car.

Sheriff's investigator Corey Black said no charges have yet been filed against the father and son pending further investigation, but possession of stolen property charges are likely.

"We're still trying to determine ownership of the property," Black said. "Some of the identification numbers were removed."


Dog eats master's Masters tickets

SEATTLE, April 5 (UPI) -- A Seattle man whose tickets to the Masters golf tournament were eaten by his dog said officials agreed to exchange the regurgitated scraps for new tickets.

Russ Berkman said he had four passes to Wednesday's practice round of the Masters and he was dismayed to arrive home recently to find paper scraps on the floor and the tickets missing, Seattlepi.com reported Wednesday.

Berkman told Sports Radio KJR, Seattle, he soon determined the tickets had been eaten by his Swiss mountain dog, Sierra. He said his girlfriend recommended he induce the canine to vomit and he did so safely by giving her hydrogen peroxide.

"Quite frankly, she didn't really have much else in her stomach but that, so it worked out," Berkman said. "I grabbed a spatula, put (the vomit) into a Ziploc baggie and brought it inside on my kitchen counter, and started, I guess, either a 'CSI' or surgical-type process to figure out what was going to be salvageable, if anything."

Berkman said he was able to mostly piece together the tickets and Masters officials agreed to reprint the tickets.


Casino worker turns in backpack with Rolex

LAS VEGAS, April 5 (UPI) -- A man who left his backpack, which contained a $13,000 Rolex watch, in the parking lot of a Las Vegas hotel praised the honesty of an employee who turned it in.

Orlando Perez of Los Angeles said he went back inside the Luxor hotel and casino after packing up his car to eat breakfast and do some last-minute gambling when he realized he had left his backpack in the parking lot, the Las Vegas Sun reported Wednesday.

"I thought it was gone, but one of the employees said I should check with security," Perez said. "They had it."

Perez, who said he was relieved to find his $13,000 Rolex was still in the bag, said he was unable to thank the honest worker in person.

"That's honesty," he said. "It may have been a guy. It may have been a girl. I waited around and wanted to thank them. But I never got to whoever it was."

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