Subscribe | UPI Odd Newsletter Subscribe The crime of the century!!! Hold onto your hat!!! Two days before the new Smurfs movie opened, three workers at Everything Entertainment, an event-production company, made off with a variety of Smurf souvenirs and promotional items, such as figurines, bags and lollipops, the New York Post reported. Advertisement Needless to say, on the New York City Outrage Meter this barely raised a blip -- slightly more interesting than jaywalking, slightly less alarming than staying up past your bedtime. But at least it is one case file the police can close -- the Case, in this case, of the the Missing Blues. Three presumably former professional Smurf paraphernalia promoters were charged with petit larceny and fifth-degree criminal possession of stolen property. One of the suspects in the case went so far as to post on his Facebook page his plan to go "Mackin smurfs," which might mean anything, but it also might mean it is time to tell the children were the little blue Smurfs really come from. Don't try this in Putnam, Conn. Or, by extension, any Dunkin' Donuts store: Handing the clerk a fake bomb. After ordering a drink at the drive-through window, a woman picked up her beverage and handed the clerk a package and a note that said the package contained a bomb, The Harford Courant reported. Advertisement The note also said a person in the backseat of the car was threatening her. Police said there was no bomb in the package and they were searching for the woman. When in Rome, don't do what the Romans do. How many layers of weird is this? The story starts this way: Police said they went undercover in gladiator garb. Question: How's that again? Answer: To blend in with the rest of of the gladiators, of course. The idea, the BBC reported, was to arrest about 20 costumed workers who wear gladiators costumes and charge tourists for posing in pictures. The Roman gladiators, as it were, are also employed by tourist agencies who pay them to promote their services. Only, here's what happens when police disguise themselves as gladiators because some of the gladiators are attacking other gladiators over territorial disputes for prime spots near the Colosseum. Well, the police get attacked. By whom? By a bunch of gladiators, of course. At the Colosseum, of course. Question: How many script writers want to take a crack at this? Answer: Most likely all of them.
