Jockstrip: The world as we know it.

Bigfoot hoaxers beat feet

ATLANTA, Aug. 19 (UPI) -- The alleged corpse of Bigfoot has been ruled a hoax and now the perpetrators appear to just as elusive as the mythical creature.

The Searching for Bigfoot Web site said the frozen form two Atlanta men had claimed last week was Sasquatch was really just a costume, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported Tuesday. Now the men, former Clayton County police officer Matthew Whitton and car salesman Rick Dyer, aren't being quite so talkative, reported the newspaper, which said its calls to them weren't returned.

The Web site said the hoax was revealed when the block of ice containing the figure melted during the weekend and the pair later confessed it was only a costume.

Whitton, 28, had been on medical leave after being shot in the wrist by a robbery suspect this year, but was fired after his boss heard about the charade.

"He's disgraced himself, he's an embarrassment to the Clayton County Police Department, his credibility and integrity as an officer is gone, and I have no use for him," Chief Jeffrey Turner said. "His behavior is unbecoming of that of a police officer."

Book rejects metrosexual for 'retrosexual'

LONDON, Aug. 19 (UPI) -- A British author has written a book that posits the opposite of the so-called metrosexual man is a "retrosexual."

Dave Besley's new book, "The Retrosexual Manual: How To Be a Real Man," urges readers to reject such metrosexual concepts as carrying purse-like bags, being flattered by attention from gay men and referring to men's toiletries as "products," The Sun reported Tuesday.

Besley wrote the retrosexual man instead engages in behaviors including rejecting foreplay in favor of having the woman send a text when she's ready for intercourse and avoiding public crying at all costs.

The book says retrosexuals are not allowed to know the definitions of words such as manicure, pedicure, facial and exfoliation. They also must only give women compliments in such a way that denotes a lack of understanding -- for example, Besley suggests men tell their women, "That's a nice badge, brooch-type thing you're wearing."

Topless parade given go-ahead by judge

AUCKLAND, New Zealand, Aug. 19 (UPI) -- A judge in Auckland, New Zealand, has ruled against the city's attempt to halt a parade featuring topless women on bikes.

Steve Crow, a pornography entrepreneur and organizer of the "Boobs on Bikes" parade, said after the ruling that the event will go forward as scheduled Thursday, the Wellington Dominion Post reported Tuesday.

Judge Nicola Mathers rejected the Auckland City Council's attempt to obtain an interim injunction to prevent the parade on the grounds that the idea is offensive. She said in her ruling that while the parade may be tacky, she does not agree that it is offensive and the city has no laws preventing women from being bare-breasted in public.

"This was an incredibly balanced and well thought out and complete decision and I am amazed that any person can listen to all we heard in the court and reach that decision in 24 hours," Crow said after the decision.

Fleeing robber drops ID

NEW YORK, Aug. 19 (UPI) -- Police chasing a suspected shoplifter in New York got a break when the man discarded a wallet holding his identification and his alleged victim's credit cards.

Trent Jones allegedly worked with an accomplice last week at the Pioneer Market in Manhattan. Police believe he took a wallet from an 81-year-old widow's pocketbook while his buddy talked to her about tomatoes, the New York Post reported.

When the woman realized her wallet was gone, managers at the store helped her look for the suspects on store surveillance tapes. They then looked out the door and saw the two men they had just seen on tape hanging out across the street.

Jeremy Diaz, one of the managers, said the accomplice jumped on a bus and escaped. The other man ran into traffic on Lexington Avenue and was hit by a car but was able to keep running.

As he ran, he allegedly tossed the wallet, apparently to get rid of incriminating evidence. But the contents identified him as Trent Jones, 25.