Holiday can put parents, students at odds

GETTYSBURG, Pa., Nov. 21 (UPI) -- The first Thanksgiving after a teenager has gone away to college can result in conflicting expectations between parent and child, a U.S. expert suggests.

Kathy Bradley, a licensed psychologist and director of health and counseling at Gettysburg College in Pennsylvania, said that the root of most problems or disagreements between parents and children during holiday breaks is a "clash in expectations."

"Parents may have it in mind that their children are coming home to spend four days with them and isn't it going to be lovely," Bradley said in a statement. "And students have it in mind that they are going to go home, do their laundry and reconnect with their friends from high school."

In addition, parents often feel their student's personality has changed since leaving home, but Bradley explained that it is not his or her personality that has changed but rather the level of independence.

Bradley advises that parents and student discuss their holiday plans and negotiate the amount of time spent with family versus friends. Parents should explain their expectations. For example, if a child is not home by a certain time, he or she should call.