SAO PAULO, Nov. 26 (UPI) -- "So, don't you miss your family living so far away from them?" a Brazilian friend once asked me.
My reply, though honest, was horrifying to him. "No, not really," I said nonchalantly. "I see them twice a year."
It's a notion Brazilians just can't comprehend. Seeing your family only twice a year? Most Brazilian children live with their parents until they get married, some until they can afford a home of their own.
I'm often asked if my parents frequently visit (they never have) and if I'll live with them when I return to the states (only when hell gets a snow cone machine).
I'm OK with it, and so are they.
It's not that I don't like my family, they're great. They supported and nurtured me until it was time to leave the nest. But live with them now as I rapidly approach 30? I can safely say there would be some serious reservations about that on both ends.
But here in Brazil, family is first and foremost in people's hearts. During the almost two years I've spent living in South America's largest city, I can honestly say I've never heard a Brazilian say a disparaging word about a family member. Sure, I've seen brothers squabble and even a friend's mother grab him by the ear, but not matter what, it's always hugs and kisses every time they see one another.
Perhaps that's why the American tradition of Thanksgiving is so foreign to them. Having asked a number of Brazilians what they knew or thought about turkey day, almost all of them gave me that same absent face, shoulder shrug reaction I get when I ask people what they think about politics or the economy. Bottom line: they often know nothing about either one.
It struck me as odd because Brazilians celebrate other American holidays. Halloween has caught on here in recent years. And of course Valentines Day is celebrated, even though they have their own "Dia de Namorados" (Lovers' Day) in June.
But Thanksgiving? It just doesn't register on the Brazilian radar. For a while I couldn't figure out why it wasn't at least acknowledged here.
Then it occurred to me, it's not that they don't comprehend Thanksgiving as an American celebration commemorating the arrival and settling of the Pilgrims at Plymouth Rock. There are plenty of national holidays celebrating Brazil's founding. It's because Thanksgiving is really about spending time with family and catching up with those relatives you only see once a year, staring at you from the other side of an oversized, stuff bird.
Those Brazilians I've met that know about Thanksgiving have usually experienced it firsthand while living in the United States.
"My first experience with Thanksgiving was pretty cool," said Marcela Pereira, a secretary who spent a year as a student living with a family in South Dakota. She recounted how her hosts laid out a spread of delicacies you usually don't get in these parts. But what really impressed her was the family's genuine desire to celebrate their fortune in just being together.
"I really liked seeing the appreciation they showed for one another," said Pereira. "And of course the turkey was delicious."
While the American family may not be as close as its Brazilian counterpart, Thanksgiving seems to be the perfect excuse for us to be a little more Brazilian in the way we treat our relatives, even if it is only once a year.
